I am comfy

If I tell people that I could have moved on to a better job, with a better pay but I failed to follow up with my documents...they'd think I am crazy. But I am now comfortable here...sitting here, on a Friday night in November, looking out at the lights in South Orange County: the cars on 55 North Bound have white lights, and the ones on 55 South bound with red lights...Occasionally a plane goes over the freeway and our building, ready to land at SNA--John Wayne Airport.

After 10 months, I am finally so comfy that I am not terrified of being alone on a Friday night, with mom, dad, mamani and sis gone...and Him gone...I am finally what Dr. W called "being well-grounded". Well...I am back to being well-grounded b/c i would like to believe that I was fine before...I am finally healing... Serotonin levels are high... She did say it's gonna take a year.

I am so comfy, I wear the same pair of jeans every Friday that's a casual day and wear no make- up.

I am so comfy I tell off my bosses...jokingly of course...

I even have a heater for my office...where am I supposed to go now? Why would I give up my comfort zone?

When they asked me why I stayed for three years at CHCR, I lied and said I wanted to work for them after graduation...but the truth was I had become comfy there too...in control, in charge, master of all things. That's why I stayed.

How long is this comfort going to last this time?