Divorce in Fearland

People have different fears.

Her fear is letting someone else seeing her naked body while they have sex...that is, of course, if "they" ever have sex since she hasn't decided if that's the right thing for her to do yet.

I don't have that fear. I may have had it before at some point but I got over it. I can walk around naked pretty comfortably, maybe even wash the dishes naked--although I have yet to try that one.

My fear is balancing my checkbook...I just can't do it. It seems silly but I refuse to do it and I get hurt for not doing it all the time. I have to pay high fees for my fear.

Everyone thinks their fear is the so important, so real, so justified.

Then, we marry our fears in a jurisdiction that doesn't do divorce. Maybe I should advocate for more liberal divorce laws in Fearland: One day you wake up and you decide to file the Petition to divorce your fear. You pay your filing fee of $320 and go to court. You tell the judge your story. Of course, your fear would fight for the relationship. He would not want to sign the divorce papers at first. Then you get a lawyer and pay lots of money for your case. Months go by. Fear moves out but you still share the same credit cards.

Finally, the trial date arrives and your dissolution is final. You get your judgment and are supposedly free for the rest of your life. But suddenly, it dawns on you that you miss Him, and you miss the life that you two had built together all these years, that things were so normal and predictable at least when He was around, that he defined you and your identity...that you are so lost without Him.

What do you do now? You look for another Fear, of course, because you think it's the type of Fear that was the issue, that you were incompatible with your Fear. Surely, there are other Fears out there that might suit you better...you look and you look and you find yet another Fear. This time, it takes you half the time of last time to figure this one out...and you have a third of the patience.

And on and on and on...not once you think about other options available. No one tells you that you may want to befriend your Fear and let him be...Just Be. That if you stop resisting Him, he might disappear on his own...he might evaporate into the air... if you just ignore him long enough...

No one tells you any of this and that's how Fear divorce attorneys make so much money.