It's that time of the year again--spring cleaning and time for renewal. And what a great surprise that while I write this piece, the Waste Management truck is taking out the trash!
This year, I start with my closet and I find several demons in there. There is my mother's mink coat from 40 years ago that she would never wear again, and I would not wear but still needs to be kept intact because after all, it is a mink coat. If it was up to me, I would cash it in and donate the proceeds to a children's charity letting my heart breathe a little but...it's not mine, it's hers and she has asked me to keep it for her--that and a million other "things" she can not function without. I have decided to forgive her for her need to cling to "stuff" though, since it makes her feel safe.
There is also the expensive "termeh" that belonged to some great grandmother, whom I never met. This termeh should be framed and put on display nicely on a wall so when the guests visit, they could say, "bah bah, what a termeh!" Instead it sits in a bag and I am not about to frame it anytime soon. For now, this one stays too.
There are other demons in my closet: an ex-boyfriend's sweater which is neatly folded in a shoe box--but that one needs to go now. It served its purpose and it's time.
The closet is the easiest part of this process. I am more worried about the demons in my soul and obsessively search for a way to clean them out. The demons that caused me to hurt others, end friendships abruptly and without reason, walk away from commitments and fail at my responsibilities as an adult.
How do I get rid of those?
